
It took five minutes, more or less,
to fill, with what he left behind,
a cardboard box and to compress
into its space, his life, unsigned
in much the way some paintings are,
then stash it in the waiting car.
In those five minutes, I remained
there in the small, vacated room,
while the red-faced landlord explained
a small arrears. Would I assume
responsibility and pay?
My conscience made me easy prey.
*****
Richard Fleming writes: “Growing old, I find myself preoccupied with life’s endings: a balancing of accounts, so to speak, and the inevitable feelings of regret and remorse for things done badly or left undone. Deliberations of that sort inspired this piece of verse, as did the lonely, final years of renowned Guernsey-born novelist, G B Edwards, the demise of an old friend in similar straitened circumstances and, of course, Larkin’s famous poem, Mr Bleaney. I think ‘His Room’ manages, despite its brevity, to encapsulate the ‘whimper’ with which some lives end. A simple rhyme scheme seems best suited to the poem’s mundane subject matter.”
Richard Fleming is an Irish-born poet currently living in Guernsey, a small island midway between Britain and France. His work has appeared in various magazines, most recently Snakeskin, Bewildering Stories, Lighten Up Online, the Taj Mahal Review and the latest Potcake Chapbook ‘Lost Love’, and has been broadcast on BBC radio. He has performed at several literary festivals and his latest collection of verse, Stone Witness, features the titular poem commissioned by the BBC for National Poetry Day. He writes in various genres and can be found at www.redhandwriter.blogspot.com or Facebook https://www.facebook.com/richard.fleming.92102564/
Photo: “Emptied cardboard box” by Creativity103 is licensed under CC BY 2.0.
V fine spare pome… and yes, alas, all too applicable to Gerald Edwards…
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Spare poem for a spare situation. Very finely done, indeed.
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There are clear echoes of Larkin here. A deceptively clever rhyme scheme and a haunting atmosphere.
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Jane, I agree with the Larkin and the haunting… but you’ll have to explain the “deceptively clever”-ness of the rhyme scheme. It is certainly a most appropriate form for the content, but not uncommon and pretty straightforward – unless I’m missing something?
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I like this little cardboard box poem very much indeed. It’s like a little box itself, neatly folded, idea done and dusted, but utterly readable again and again.
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Nicely expressed Nell, and I quite agree. I first read it in Snakeskin a couple of years ago, and flagged it then for when I might assemble a suitable chapbook.
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